Today marks what is turning out to be a very sad day in the Cole house. Let me explain...
Solomonhas been a MAJOR binkie addict from DAY ONE!!! He is going to be 3 at the end of the month (tears!) and I have been noticing his teeth seem to be shifting, as in, his front teeth are kind of leaning forward. So Will and I, who have attempted to get rid of the binkie to no avail before, have been trying to think of how we are going to do this. it just so happens that the softy of the two of us (Will!!!) is away on busienss this weekend. My sister and the kids and I were going to go to Target. Solomon said "can I get a fire truck?" I said..."Hmmm...well, would you be willing to pack up your binkies and trade them into the Target lady for a fire truck?" He thought about and agreed. We went around the house on a binkie hunt and collected all 50 milion of his binkies and put them in a bag. I let him hold them on the drive there and while we looked around Target. I explained that we were going to pick out a HUGE fire truck, a BIG BOY TOY, and he was going to "buy" that toy with his binkies. But he had to know, they wouldn't come home with us (ok that was a lie but I had to get him to understand) and that he would NO LONGER have binkies. I was VERY VERY thorough!!! He definately got what I was saying. So we picked out a massive fire truck that is as obnoxious as can be...makes noise and has a ladder that moves...its JUST what he wanted...
So...I ran ahead to our cashier, who I picked our specifically bc she is always SUPER nice...and ask her if she wouldn't mind playing along...she said "OH OF COURSE!!!" So...the transaction takes place, she tells him what a BIG BOY he is...my sister and I make a HUGE deal out of it...
On the ride home he was holding his massive fire truck and just being SUPER happy that he had it...
Until........
We got home...
He looks at me with panic on his face..."Mommy, where are my binkies?"
"We gave them to the target lady..."
"no...no....nooooooooooooooooo...I want to go back to Target...I want to go hit that lady for taking my binkies!!!"
He starts to get really upset, hitting and throwing and kicking everything in sight! I tried talking to him, holding him, giving him his blankets...nothing...he was still inthis horrid state of rage!!!
So I took him outside...and I told himhe could hit and kick and throw anything he wanted...and he did. He seemed to feel a lot better. After we came inside he said "Mommy if I throw my fire truck outside may I have my binkies back?" I told him no and that the target lady had them (which by the way...I feel AWFUL for lying...because she gave them back to me and they are in my purse...is that terrible??? What would YOU do?"
Nap time...on how that time of day is bliss for me. Solomon has always been THE best napper on earth...even now, I just lay just him to get in bed, turn out the lights, kiss him and close his door...and he is out...well that was WITH binkies!!!!!! Ahhhhhhh....I feel like I have a heroin addict for a child...he was writhing in "pain" (heartache), weeping, talking about how much he wants to hit and kick that target lady...I kid you not he said "mommy, I am not ok...I am not going to get thru this!!!" Its was HORRIBLE!!!! He cried and cried and cried for 45 minutes!!! He asked me to rock him, which I haven't done in forever and he still cried and cried...gosh...it was torture. I was near tears...and near marching down to my purse and getting those damn binkie for my poor addict...who would have ever though a 3 year old might need bink rehab!!!
He finally fell asleep...but how long is this going to last? Did I do the wrong thing? SHould I let him have them back? Am I totally ripping something away from him that he NEEDS???? Please....help me!!!!
2 comments:
awww poor lil' binkie addict! I think you handled it perfectly, don't worry! I wouldn't give them back, but if you feel bad about telling him the Target lady has them you could always change it to something like "Remember we bought your fire truck with your binkies" or something like that, just change the wording a bit, heheh. I think taking him outside to let his anger out was a really good idea. I bet in a few days he'll forget all about it.
Well, I haven't dealt with this, yet, but Kaitlyn is pretty attached to her binkies, too, so if she doesn't lose interest on her own, I'll have to try something. That being said, I have no experience in this, but I do understand how much it breaks your heart and hurts to see Solomon upset over something that you can "fix." I do, however, think that giving them back to him will only undermine his own confidence in his ability to handle stressful situations and make it that much harder in the future. As you know, giving in usually sets you back, plus, you have a legitimate reason for wanting him to kick the binkie habit. I am very impressed with his ability to verbalize how difficult this is for him and how awful he feels inside. I really do think that this will be a great growing experience for him, one he might even remember and built upon in the future. Good luck!
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